observer or ...absorber

Situation

Before I reactively deny it, let me observe deep within if the opinion I have about myself is based on what others see or believe about me and especially the important ones for me.

We usually find our thoughts being swayed by whatever we hear from others about us. The moment I stop observing and start reacting to what they say, I feel the look in my eyes changing… it is a sign that my heart has started believing all those things. It is a sign that I've lost the seat of being the detached observer and I have become the…absorber.

In a short time I have adopted a foreign opinion about myself…

Soulution

...independently of how many foreign views I have adopted about myself there's one that exists within me eternally and is the true one.  And if I have forgotten how is it to believe in the self and in this little inner voice that guides me, it doesn't matter … this voice hasn't forgotten me. It remains and waits for me to remember it. Because it is the only thing within me that is eternal, it is imperishable; all other things are artificial constructions of the human mind, "approaches" or "analyses" or "ideas" and as every artificial thing… they have an expiry date.

}When I begin to recognise my uniqueness and my specialities as a spiritual being and remind myself about them consciously and I keep acting through them daily then I can say that I've started stabilising my real self-respect (inside out)…

 And what are the signs of true self respect?... I will be like a peach (?) What is its basic characteristic? Its core is powerful and self-protected. A peach may be soft on the outside which means that it doesn't react to circumstances and people, it doesn’t get angry and doesn't reject whatever it doesn't like, is not critical and it doesn't try to humiliate someone or even try to correct them in order to show power… the peach has power but it doesn't show… it is the power itself…It listens to everything and it sees things but doesn't absorb them in its core… through exercise it is already aware of its core and so it achieves real protection… it doesn't need to defend its existence physically or verbally… because a peach is the protection of its own self.     

Exercise in Silence

For only a few minutes, I bring to my mind a room full of light with a sunny view… I the soul look through the "windows" of my body…I send out all the people that are gathered inside my mind to enjoy their life, just for few minutes… "guides", "teachers", "gurus", students", "mirrors", "my other halves", "companions", beloved ones or not, 'critics' of my life, enemies and friends, strangers and acquaintances, softly and politely, without reacting or holding grudges, I open the door of my room, I thank them for their presence and I say to them that I would like to be "alone" for some time… to be with myself.

I allow myself to feel what remains when everyone is gone… who am I? what do I feel? 

I remain in this feeling and I prolong it for as long as I wish… I look through the window and I enjoy the clear sky and the sun or the full moon that enters the room… for just few minutes I immerse myself in this light… I enjoy my existence…